


If At First You Don't Succeed...

by AceQueenKing



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, Bad Advice, F/M, Sibling Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-10
Updated: 2017-11-10
Packaged: 2019-01-31 15:11:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12684390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceQueenKing/pseuds/AceQueenKing
Summary: Carver and Merrill both seek outside advice for their first time, but the advice they're given is ....decidedly mixed.





	If At First You Don't Succeed...

**Author's Note:**

  * For [amarmeme](https://archiveofourown.org/users/amarmeme/gifts).



“And so the prodigal brother comes to his sister for Advice,” Marian cackled, rubbing her fingers together. Carter groaned, pressing his head into his hands. Asking for this sort of thing was fucking embarrassing enough, but that it had to be Marian – oh, Maker. He did not know what he had done in a previous life, but surely he was paying for it now.

“Please spare me, Marian,” he said, his face going red. “It’s hard enough to ask my own sister such an – an impossible thing!”

“Who said anything about it being impossible?” Marian winked and poked her tongue out in a pattern that he felt helpless to replicate. He hadn’t been aware his face could flush redder, but here it was, the blood pounding in his skin.

“Marian, please!”

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” she said, grabbing his hand and squeezing it. “Really, bro, the fact you want to learn how to please Merrill is – well, it’s really sweet.”

“You’re not making me feel anything but embarrassed,” he grumbled. “Look do you think I want to go to my sister with this – this kind of question?”

“Mm. Better me than Gamlen,” she said, and they both shuddered.  “Though I’m not sure why me, though.”

“Well, you’re with Isabella, and – you know, she’s always saying…” He blushed harder. He wasn’t very close with Isabella, but she’d been nothing if not loud about her admiration of Marian – and Marian’s tongue, and Marian’s fingers, and all the sorts of ways that Marian could pleasure her without having a dick. “Men are good for five things, but women are good for seven?”

Marian giggled and nearly fell off her chair. “Glad you’re finding it so funny,” he said, mumbling. “I’m glad my love-life is hilarious.”

“Ahahaha, look, I’m sorry,” she said, laughing. “It’s just – this is really funny! I won’t tell anyone, I promise, I promise.”

“I just…” He sighed, gripping the table. “Look,  Merrill is worth a full seven. She’s nice. I – “He was aware of Hawke’s eyes burning on him, and he had to look away, uncomfortable with telling his sister how he felt. “I really love her.”

“Oh my god.” Hawke leaned over and hugged him, an odd enough thing that he froze before awkwardly returning it. “Okay. Listen. I am going to teach you. You are going to be the finest pussy licker outside of the Blooming Rose.”

“Hawke – “

“Maybe even in it.” She locked eyes with him, seemingly far less squeamish than her younger brother. “Look. First thing. You take your time. Don’t dive into her, don’t instantly go to the pussy. It’s a dance, not a race.”

“A dance,” he said, trying to remember. That seemed easy enough – he could slow down, let Merrill lead, follow her steps – he didn’t know how experienced she was, but he knew it had to be a damn site better than his experience. Or at least he hoped so since one of them should know what they were doing.

“You’ll be fine.” She elbowed him. “Stop being so nervous. It’s gonna shrink your dick.”

“Marian!” Carter yelped.

Marian rolld her eyes. “Okay, okay. Second rule: change your pace. Don’t just suck on her clit the full time, but don’t tongue her cunt for an hour. Move around, explore; go hard, go soft. Keep her guessing.”

“So just – randomly?” He tilted his head. “What if she doesn’t like one?”

“That’s rule three, and most important.” She put her hands on the table, spread out in front of her. “Just –  follow how she feels, bro. She’ll moan, groan, give you signals – and if she does that, well, you just do what makes her feel good, and shell be signing your praises in elvish soon enough.”

She clapped him on the back and smiled.

“You’ll do fine, tiger.” Marian winked. “Go get’em tiger.”

“By the dread wolf, I’m so sorry,” Merrill said, blushing on his lap. She was soft and beautiful, her dark hair curled around her ears. “I really don’t know what Im doing, I just – want to do.”

He laughed softly, ignoring the pain from where she’d accidentally hit a rip earlier. It seemed that Merrill had heard that humans liked to be jumped upon, which – he wasn’t sure where she heard that, but whoever it was, they were almost impossibly cruel. Thankfully Merrill hadn’t shattered a rib, but she hadn’t stopped apologizing since then.

“I do too,” he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I’ve had a lot of things in my life go wrong, Merill. This isn’t even in the top ten.”

“Even so.”

Her cheeks were bright pink, the rest of her face following down to her jaw and even flooding the peaks of adorable, elfin ears. "Oh I knew I shouldn't have taken Isabela's advice, she had such a wicked smile and she told me - she told me it was only for bold ones. I just - I wanted you to think I was so impressive, knowing about your culture and - " 

"Merrill," he said, cupping her cheek. "It's OK. You're not Isabela, and I'm not Marian." He wrinkled his nose a bit in distaste; it wasn't that he hated his sister, but they had a habit of disagree on almost every possible issue - save Merrill.  

"Thank goodness," she said, sniffling. "By the dread wolf, I would be afraid of what she would do to me in this situation."  
  
Carter nodded. His sister tended to be a bit of a smart-ass, which wasn't exactly a great mix when one was already so easily embarrassed. His sister worked well with Bella - they were both smart-asses with better heads for business than deep, philosophical questions  - but he would never imagine her with Merrill. 

And, as usual, his sister's loss was his gain. 

"You won't have to find out," he murmured. "We'll keep this between us."

"Ah, thank you," she sniffed. "So am I to assume that the biting the neck thing - that wasn't a particularly great human thing either?"  
  
"Ah, maybe for some but - not so much for me." He said apologetically, pressing his hands into her own. "What are elf things like?"

"You show you care for a person," she said, slowly. "You bring one another gifts and then you see one another naked and there's some business I never paid much attention to, and then you have a baby."  
  
"Well, I promise, humans are much the same." He pressed a kiss to the side of her still quite pinkish neck. His stomach trembled with anticipation and Carver - Carver was ready to put all the things he'd been spending time learning about women's special tastes into action. The thought that he'd had to go to Marian had rankled, but better his sister - who would  _mostly_  be counted on to give  _mildly_ decent advice, for the price of completely embarrassing you - than Isabela, who was, frankly, a terror, if her advice to Merril was any indication.  He doubted she had meant for him to wind up kneed in the dick by an over-eager elf las, but still: Isabella rarely took into account the abilities of who she was giving advice to.  Perhaps, he thought, it would be best if they just explored one another. 

"Why don't I show you something I've ...er, looked up?" He said, running a hand down her arms. Maker but she was a comely lass, the angles and corners of her body resembling nothing, to Carter, so much as a beautiful lark. 

"Al-alright," Merrill said, her hands covering her breasts. "What do I do?"  
  
"Lay back," he whispered, softly. I have got you. I've got you. 

He took his time with her then, remembering one of his sister's golden rules. That was the last time he gave his sister any thought, as he busied himself exploring every aspect of Merrill he could - the narrow divot where her neck met her chest, the soft peaks of cherry-red stubs above her breast, and, oh maker, the divot of her stomach - he saved eacch and every one of them, the tangy taste of her skin, the soft, woods-like scent of her.

And then he reached the flower between her legs and - oh, maker, he could have spent an entire night there, experiencing her - her taste, her flavors, her scent. When he realized he could, he was quite happy about it - if not, of course, as happy as Merrill.

\- - - 

"Did you have a good date?" Marian Hawke said, grinning as her brother crossed back into the Amell estate. He was dressed like he certainly had; disheveled and walking into the Amell estate only after the fifth cock's crow. "Certainly looks like you did."  
  
"Something like that, yes," he said, sitting at the table. Marian took pity on him, letting him sit and fetching him a cup of coffee. 

"Looks like my advice helped," she said, softly. At least, I hope?"

"Oh yes," he said, sounding quite dazed and exhausted. "But tell your girlfriend she gives terrible advice."

"Oh dear," she said, bringing her own cup of coffee to her lips. There was a story there, Hawke thought, and she couldn't wait to go to Isabel and hear it. 


End file.
